Local Pizza Entrepreneur Inspired To Plop & Drop Staff December 8, 2016 All Stories, Anyways..., As if..., Business, Stories 1 Comment The PlaP Plop & Drop will provide new honey pails complete with toilet paper roll for the full ones. Portage la Prairie, MB – While most Portage la Prairians were huddled under blankets watching Netflix, Alicia Smith came up with a plan to make money when the snow flies by marketing her pizzas to stranded truckers by teaming up with a local septic company. “We’re calling the promotion the PlaP Plop and Drop special,” explained Smith. “With one text or call semi drivers can have a pizza and pop delivered and their poop pail emptied at the same time.” Recently stranded truckers were complaining to authorities that no one was bringing them food or water while they were storm stayed in Portage. Smith read about the trucker’s woes in the local paper, some refer to as the Pelechaty Post, and came up with a solution. The unique offer will address two of the truckers primary needs, how they get fed and then how to empty their “honey pails” that can overflow with number one and two(not to be confused with the highways) during long layovers. City officials welcome the new service as a much better option to dumping the poop pails on city streets or in fast food restaurant bathrooms. Health authorities voiced some concern over the plan to mix business with pleasure but Smith feels she has a solution. “The delivery people will make sure to wear gloves and we will be swapping new ‘honey pails’ for the old ones rather than worrying about dumping them on site.” Possible uniforms for the delivery and pickup people. Looks like it might get chilly. The PlaP Plop and Drop will be marketed with flyers and on social media. “If that doesn’t work we will hire more attractive delivery girls and dress them in seductive outfits to make it more appealing to have a pizza delivered and the poop picked up.” Whether or not the pizza comes and the poop leaves on a power toboggan or via a sultry delivery driver in a 4X4, Smith’s pizza business is about to boom during the next blizzard. A quick survey of local truckers’ indicated a high level of interest for the service with 8.5 drivers out of 10 pledging to order some hot ‘za the next time they are stranded. “Two things we can count on living here are blizzards and the Trans Canada Highway getting closed a few times every year,” said Smith. “I thought we might as well turn some of that white into green even if it means getting our hands dirty.” Notice to readers: Please be advised that while Portage la Prairie is a real place, the content of this and other stories on this website are based on fiction and the imagination of humans. Some events, people and places may resemble reality but the fact remains the information is unreliable, lacking in credibility and truth. Some of this may seem real to some readers but more reasonable people will pick up on the humour and satire. Consumption of this and other stories may cause dizziness, dry mouth, facial blemishes, hives, and thin hair. Should you experience an erection lasting more than four hours please seek medical treatment. This corporation assumes no responsibility for your grasp on reality, ability to tolerate sarcasm, humour and mocking comments. In addition they assume no responsibility for any resulting effects from digesting the content in this and other posts relating to but not limited to the aforementioned website and ancillary media products and modes of transportation. Please read and discuss at your own risk and with great caution. Should you feel nauseous at any point while reading this content please glance away from the screen or leave the website, social media or print page and the feeling should pass. This offer is not valid with any other offer and carries no cash or other value not to mention merit. Drive safe and drink responsibly, always consume in moderation. We like oatmeal and beans. Never open your doors to strangers with weapons or offer rides to same. Please no parking without a permit. And yes, objects are larger than they appear in mirrors – unless the mirrors cause magnification in which case the object would be smaller in reality. Please consult a physician before working out. Call your mom. Pray for Portage. Possible alternative replacement honey pails. One Response Robert Watson December 9, 2016 The matter of trucker’s ‘honey pails’ must be addressed by City Hall. For years I’ve seen them carrying white pails of stench into the local fast food joints to dump them in the washroom. It smells as you would imagine times 10. The Mayor should stop them from doing this. This story, while funny, raises some very serious problems our City Council and Prime Minister are ignoring Reply Leave a Reply Cancel Reply Your email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email.