ELECTION 2015

While visiting local hairdressers, Justin Trudeau promised to help them and their industry get the respect they deserve claim unconfirmed, unreliable, fictional sources. “They are a vital part of the economy and are the emotional backbone of our country.”

He admitted to hairdressers having significant influence into his political life.  It is a place I can go and feel important, like they care about me… I always leave feeling heard.”

When asked if he felt Mulcair’s beard gave him a leg up with local Hutterite voters he proudly declared, “If elected, I will grow a beard twice as large as Mulcair’s.  A beard that will be infinitely longer and thicker than what Stephen Harper will sport because he wants to cut the deficit right away.”

Trudeau was pressed to explain what beards had to do with deficits.  “Quite frankly, nothing, but my speaking points tell me to blame everything on Harper wanting to eliminate the deficit.”

“Hair cuts not budget cuts.  This is what Canadians want,” said Trudeau leaving the salon.

About The Author

Drew Peacock

Drew is a military kid who came to Portage in the late 80’s when his father came to CFB Southport. Since then Drew Peacock has graduated from Arthur Meighen High School and was his class valedictorian. After high school he almost graduated with honours from the University of Manitoba. He was just one credit short but never got around to finishing due to an active social life and interest in politics. Drew Peacock has worked for all major political parties as a vote enhancer, call centre dispatcher and fundraiser. Most recently Drew has been the local Chamber of Commerce President and editor of his own internet blog, “The Real Meaning of Politics," which can be found on the world-wide-web if you have a computer. Drew has been married to his wife Rose for 20 years and considers himself apolitical and asexual. Drew Peacock will be The Hoop and Holler’s new political editor and Vice President of distribution.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.