House Cat Shocked Outside Drew Peacock October 26, 2015 All Stories, As if... Portage la Prairie – A local frisky feline was overwhelmed when it accidentally and momentarily ventured outside. The cat’s caretaker, Jack Hoffer, noticed the normally housebound cat squirming uncontrollably on the step. “She must have gotten out when I grabbed the mail, “ said and emotional Hoffer. “I never let her out. She has no idea what to do in the world.” After rubbing its scent on the concrete, Muffy trotted over to a low bush and sniffed it long and hard. Jack Hoffer quickly snatched up the cat before it came across the neighbour cat’s feces in the flower bed. “I didn’t want Muffy sticking her nose in that scruffy cat’s poop. Muffy is a very clean and good cat. It shouldn’t have to experience the neighbour’s crap,” Hoffer explained. Tensions have been on the rise between Hoffer and his neighbour over how to properly raise a pet feline. “Cats should stay inside and go to the bathroom in a litter box. These are domesticated animals not wild things!” Hoffer added. Neighbour, Justin Dufront has a different opinion. “Cat’s should be allowed to roam around and do what comes naturally. Only small-minded idiots would keep their cats inside all the time,” said Dufront. The neighbouring cat lovers rift goes deeper than whether or not to let their pets outdoors. “He even shaved his cat this spring and let it run around the whole neighbourhood, “ said Hoffer. “The thing looked like a freak, completely unnatural.” “Every spring we get Pumpkin trimmed up to look like a mini-lion,” explained Dufront. “It’s cute like that. I get lots of compliments on my trimmed kitty.” To date the police have not had to intervene but the two seem unlikely to find common ground. “If he thinks I’m going to shave my cat and let it outside he’s got another thing coming,” said Hoffer. At press time Muffy was reported sitting in the window batting her tail back and forth while Pumpkin dropped a fresh turd in Hoffer’s flower bed without covering it as an act of defiance. Notice to readers: Please be advised the content of this and other stories on this website are based on fiction and the imagination of humans. Some facts and places may resemble reality but the fact remains the information is unreliable, lacking in credibility and truth. Some events and characters may seem real to some readers but more reasonable people will pick up on the humour and satire. This corporation assumes no responsibility for your grasp on reality, ability to tolerate sarcasm, humour and mocking comments. In addition they assume no responsibility for any resulting effects from digesting the content in this and other posts relating to but not limited to the aforementioned website and ancillary media products and modes of transportation. Please read and discuss at your own risk and with great caution. Should you feel nauseous at any point while reading this content please glance away from the screen or leave the website, social media or print page and the feeling should pass. This offer is not valid with any other offer and carries no cash or other value not to mention merit. Drive safe and drink responsibly, always consume in moderation. Leave a Reply Cancel Reply Your email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email.