ELECTION 2015

candice-bergenCandice Bergen has picked an unlikely location for an acting comeback.  Sources claim the 69 year-old Emmy Award winning actress is looking to team up with Portage Lisgar MP, Candice Bergen to have The New Murphy Brown sit-com shot in Portage la Prairie, Manitoba.

A long-time political activists and star of the 90’s hit sit-com Murphy Brown was in Portage last week drumming up support.

“Portage la Prairie is the perfect prairie town.  It’s quirky, charming and odd in so many ways, “ said Bergen.  “After meeting Candice Bergen the politician we decided to work together to put the pieces in place to do the show right here in Portage.” Bergen-ventr

Born in Beverly Hills to one of the world’s greatest ventriloquists, Edgar Bergen, Candice Bergen feels a deep kinship with MP Bergen.  “My father was a master and Charlie McCarthy was a phenomenal character.  Candice’s boss, Stephen Harper, reminds me of my father.  It’s just another deep connection we have.  They even look similar.”

Edgar Bergman became one of the best in the world at making people believe the dummy in front of him was actually speaking on their own.  “Growing up I was often called Charlie McCarthy’s little sister. Stephen Harper is a lot like my dad and I know Candice can relate to Charlie McCarthy,” said Bergen, former star of Ghandi and Sex in the City who also shared the silver screen with Burt Reynolds.

“Its time to bring Murphy Brown back,” said Bergen.  The 90’s sit-com sensation featured Bergen as a hard nosed reporter, single mother, and breast cancer survivor.

When asked why Portage la Prairie for the new location Bergen offered, “Hollywood is like Picasso’s bathroom.  In Portage we have so much more.  Your waste water facility smells like a soup factory.  You should be proud.  And with a famous local politician sporting my name,  and a strong local media scene, the promotional and publicity opportunities are endless.”

“We are even looking at the New Murphy Brown starting off in journalism at a local TV station but when that closes down Murphy will get into politics.  That’s where the show will mirror what Candice is doing.”

No doubt adding cameos by Stephen Harper and various other Conservative notables like Brian Mulroney, and Portage’s very own, Brian Pallister, will spice up the American sit-com with local flavour.

Candice Bergen will be back in Portage soon to help promote her new memoir “A Fine Romance”.  “I’ll be at the Portage Library for a whole Saturday next month to read out loud and sign copies for everybody.”

The other Candice Bergen continues working hard on the campaign trail with little or not time to dream about being a stand in for The New Murphy Brown.

*This story is based on unconfirmed, unreliable and fictional sources.

About The Author

Drew Peacock

Drew is a military kid who came to Portage in the late 80’s when his father came to CFB Southport. Since then Drew Peacock has graduated from Arthur Meighen High School and was his class valedictorian. After high school he almost graduated with honours from the University of Manitoba. He was just one credit short but never got around to finishing due to an active social life and interest in politics. Drew Peacock has worked for all major political parties as a vote enhancer, call centre dispatcher and fundraiser. Most recently Drew has been the local Chamber of Commerce President and editor of his own internet blog, “The Real Meaning of Politics," which can be found on the world-wide-web if you have a computer. Drew has been married to his wife Rose for 20 years and considers himself apolitical and asexual. Drew Peacock will be The Hoop and Holler’s new political editor and Vice President of distribution.

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